Catcake and Tubs Find Firsts
by Bubblegum Shoes
Summary: *WARNING: Please read the story "Brittany and Santana: Firsts" before reading this, otherwise it will NOT make ANY sense* Catcake browses the internet, and finds a certain story with some insane reviewers... Hints of ;Catcake/Tubbington;


**So, first Cubbington side story :D To anyone who is currently reading this and has NOT read my other fic Brittany and Santana: Firsts, I HIGHLY recommend you read that first. ALL OF IT. If not, you're gonna be hella confuzzled.**

**Anyhoozel, to the people who've read Firsts, HI! :D CUBBINGTON STORY OMFG AREN'T YOU EXCITED? It may not be too romance-y but still, epicness. Well, I think I should shut up and get to the story, y/y? If your username shows up, YAY! I chose your review. Fun times.**

**Okay, so FF was a bitch and had an error message whenever I tried uploading this file, so I had to replace an old file then upload it, but that messed the story up, so I had to GO BACK AND REDO ALL THE BOLDED WORDS, ALL THE WORDS IN ITALICS, AND FIX ALL THE SPACING ISSUES, AND THE ISSUES WITH THE BREAKS BETWEEN PARAGRAPHS! It was so fucking annoying. So basically, if I missed something, let's say, something looks weird 'cause it's not in italics or something, don't blame me, blame FF and their fuckery. UGH.**

**Also, this story is uncanon within the Firstsverse, since the events are super silly…and impossible. Anywayz, time for storyness.**

* * *

><p>Tubs was <em>not <em>a happy kitty right now.

The cat had barely anything to eat (since Brittany forgot to buy the cat food…again), which made him already grumpy. Then he got in a fight with 'boss lady', which ended with him getting scratched hard on the ear, and it still stung a bit. And now, to top it all off, it was seriously hot in the house, so he was finding it extremely hard to relax.

The annoyed cat was currently lounging on the stairs, bored out of his mind. That is, until he heard a few random little clicks from upstairs. Nobody was in the house except for him and Catcake…what could she be doing? Tubs, curious, hopped up the steps and followed the clicking noise to Brittany's room. Seeing the door open, the large cat, peeked into the room and saw a really strange sight, Catcake tinkering with Brittany's laptop. Tubs had heard stories about her obsession with porn, so it could be possible she was using the computer for that, but what confused him was how she was using it at all.

Tubs snuck in and hopped on the bed. Catcake gave no reaction to his appearance. "What're you doing?" Tubs asked, curiosity getting the better of him.

"Self Googling myself, as I do every Saturday," Catcake said simply.

Tubs nodded. It _did _seem like something she would do. "Uh…boss lady?"

"Yes, peasant?" Catcake asked in an irritated tone.

"How do you know to use the computer?" Tubs asked his boss.

Catcake shrugged. "I dunno. The author of this crap is pretty dumb, he couldn't even come up with a reason for how I know how to use the laptop. So basically, there is no reason. Blame it on the weirdo who writes this stuff."

Tubs blinked. "Uh…kay." Tubs considered leaving the room and finding something else to do, but sadly, he feared this was the most interesting thing going on in the house. So he stayed with his boss and looked over her shoulder, reading the sites that came up when she Googled her name.

"Hm? What's this?" Catcake mused aloud, and then she clicked on a link to a website.

"What is it?" Tubs asked, his interest peaked.

Catcake swished her tail, appearing to be deep in thought. "Something called 'Brittany and Santana: Firsts'. That couldn't be _our _Britt and San, right? Oh, by the way, rub my back."

Tubs, his attention glued to the screen, snapped out of it. "Wait what? Why?"

Catcake gave him a deathly glare and Tubs released a little squeak of fear. "Because, fatass, I'm your superior. And my back's been hurting. So rub me!"

Tubs looked down. "You know, that statement could really be taken out of context by some peopl- - -"

"_Shut up and rub my back!_" Catcake roared.

"Yes boss lady!" Tubs said timidly, quickly petting her back, to which Catcake gave a contented sigh.

"That's better," she said happily, her tail wagging much like a dog's. "Now, let's read this little thing." Catcake clicked the blue words and a new page came up, to which she began reading. "So I came up with this little idea…"

* * *

><p>An hour or so later of reading (and nonstop rubbing from Tubbington), Catcake finally finished reading aloud, to where the story stopped at chapter twenty five. "That was really neat!" Tubs said excitedly. "I can't believe we're in a story! And I never knew how sweet the girls' relationship was."<p>

Catcake stifled a laugh. "How sweet their relationship was? Are you gay, Tubs?"

"What? No! Can't a guy like a little romance?" Tubs defended.

"Yep…you're gay," Catcake said with a nod of her head, as if confirming it to herself. She turned back to the screen and then noticed something. "Whoa, the girl who wrote this has over like, four hundred reviews! It must be because everyone had to say how awesome I was."

"Um…I think it was a guy who wrote this," Tubs piped up. "They mentioned that they were a guy once or twice."

Catcake shook her head. "No, this is definitely a girl."

"I don't think it's a girl, really," Tubs insisted.

Catcake let out a guttural growl. "Okay, Captain Carbs, as your boss, I order you to shut the hell up." Once Tubs silenced himself, Catcake grinned. "Good boy! Now let's see what the reviews have to say about me and my amazingness." Catcake went over and clicked the reviews, and began reading some aloud.

_ApplesAreAwesome: I want a cat like Catcake. My cat isn't as cool as him._

Catcake gasped. "Isn't as cool as _him? _I'm a female, thank you very much!"

Tubs sighed. "You don't have to get so worked up, it was probably a typo."

"Silence! Less talking, more rubbing!" Catcake commanded in her only-for-special-occasions deep voice.

The cat continued reading the reviews.

_Sutzina Zion: Catcake has the most awesome name ever!_

Catcake smiled. "Well no derp!"

_Nadine Reading:_

Catcake paused. "Wait, reading what? _Reading what?_"

Tubs rolled his eyes. "It doesn't matter, just read the review!"

Catcake growled once more. "You know, for talking back to me, I'm docking your pay. Take that, Uncle Phil!"

Tubs groaned. "You don't even pay me!"

Catcake just ignored him and continued on with the review.

_Nadine Reading: you have no idea how much i love catcake lol Its like my favorite character_

Catcake grinned. "I like this girl, she's smart. Unlike _some _people I know!" Catcake snapped at her companion. Tubs just sighed and ignored her.

_PT-Extravaganza: I just have one question: How can you be so freaking awesome?_

"Well, I was just born this way, I guess," Catcake said, her ego inflating to new levels.

"I, uh, think they were directing that to the author," Tubs muttered, hoping this wouldn't earn him another scolding.

"You see, _this _is why I don't pay you! Talk way too much," Catcake said simply.

_James888: It's a good thing that Santana doesn't understand Catcake. I don't think that Brittany would have liked her girfriend chocking her cat :)_

"Psh, I could take her any day," Catcake boasted with an air of confidence in her voice. "Isn't that right, fat slave?"

Tubs bit back the urge to scratch his so called boss. "Yes boss lady. Of course."

_ducksticks:_

"What's a duckstick?" Tubs blurted out.

"Have no idea," Catcake muttered. "Sounds like a French pastry…and now I'm hungry."

"Me too," Tubs said sadly, missing his precious food.

"Well, no change there. You're always hungry."

Before Tubs could respond to being slashed by Catcake's vicious, vicious words, the cat went on with reading the review.

_ducksticks: LOL Lord Tubbington's appearance. But why you make him Catcake's bitch? I want them to be friends -and then promiscuos lovers- wait- what? XD_

Catcake's jaw dropped. Tubs's eyes widened. The room became filled with silence. "Wait…_what did they say?_" the two cats cried out in unison.

Catcake reread the review and began making gagging noises. "What is wrong with this person? I wouldn't screw you for a million pesos!"

Tubs rolled his eyes. "It's not like I want to do that with you either!"

Catcake scoffed. "Oh please, everyone wants a piece of me."

"Well I _don't. _I want my first time to be…special," Tubs admitted.

Catcake purred in an annoyed way. "Oh, so I'm not special enough for your high class standards?" Before Tubs could even say anything in response to that and ask why she even cared, Catcake went on and read another review.

_ShoujoAiShusekki: I now ship Cubbington. Best pairing ever._

"EW!" Catcake and Tubs both groaned in unison. Catcake continued on with the review though.

_ShoujoAiShusekki: Czar Catcake is the greatest dictator ever. I will submissively follow her every command._

"That's pretty hot," Catcake admitted, to which Tubs gave her a weird blank stare. "What, don't judge me!"

_DarkFireAngel00: …holy. shit. TEAM CUBBINGTON RIGHT HERE!_

Tubs suppressed a giggle. "Wow…we're pretty popular together."

"Shut up," Catcake said. If she was a human, her cheeks would be getting really hot right now. "Bite my shiny metal ass."

"You don't…" Tubs stopped trying to correct her, as he knew it would only make his 'pay' docked more.

_Rosetta288: I am super hyped about your Cubbington story! :):):):) I would never admit out loud how much I love those two cats..._

"Good! Never speak of us out loud ever!" Catcake yelled at the screen. "Holy balls, why do so many people want us to hook up?"

Tubs shrugged. "Maybe it's 'cause we're so sexy?" he joked.

"Hey," Catcake said irritably. "I'm the cat who brags about being sexy. Your just a long streak of nothing! Like, cat nothing!"

"Meanie," Tubs said under his breath.

_dramalover914: I think your Cubbington reads Firsts idea is stupendous!_

"I love this person," Catcake said, pointing to the username.

Tubs, confused, stared at the cat. "Why?"

"Duh, anyone who says stupendous is awesomesauce," Catcake explained, without really explaining anything.

"Riiiiight," Tubs said, unsure of what else to say.

_: Cubbington is great, and I'd totally love to read a story about them and have my review in it! :)_

"Just for that, I hope your review doesn't get read in the story," Catcake said smugly.

Tubs shook his head. "But you just read it in the story…"

"Oh…poop." There was a pause. "Okay, next review."

_: and those cats! Rofl I love those cats!_

Tubs smiled. "Well that was nice of her."

"_Well that was nice of her,_" Catcake mocked.

"Oh just read the next review!" Tubs said, who was really growing tired of Catcake's constant anger towards him.

_watdaforks: lol i love catcake's rules_

"They were pretty epic," Catcake mused, once again bragging.

"Oh yeah, how I _love _those rules," Tubs whispered to himself sarcastically.

_Ms Rosalie Hale: LOL! I love Catcake and Lord Tubbington. Can I name their first born Cabby? Maybe Cubby? Whatcha think?_

Catcake immediately shut the computer down. "No…just…no. That's it. From now on, I'm forgetting about that story, and those insane reviewers. Seriously, us, having kids? Gross! No way would I ever carry your babies in _my_ stomach! Ick!"

"I think we've learned something today," Tubs stated.

Catcake gaped at him. "What the fuck did we learn from any of this?"

Tubs sighed. "The internet is a scary place full of weird people."

Catcake nodded. "For once, Tubs, we can agree on something. Now, as your master, get the hell out of here. I've got business to attend to!" Catcake waved a paw in the air, motioning for the overweight cat to get out of there. "Go on, get out of here! You're stretching the house anyways!"

Tubs rolled his eyes. "Nice seeing you too," he said sarcastically. With that, he leapt off the bed and slinked out of the room.

Catcake craned her neck to see if he was gone. Once the coast was clear, she reopened the laptop and went back to the review pages. She looked up the last review she had read.

"Hmmm," Catcake mused out loud, "Cubby. I like that name…"

* * *

><p><strong>HAHA IT'S AWESOME 'CAUSE AT THE END YOU JUST KNOW SHE'S THINKING ABOUT HAVING TUBS'S BABIES! ^_^<strong>

**So what'd you guys think? Liked it? Hated it? Were you a PART of it? If your review wasn't in here, it's okay, I still read your comments and I still luff you all. Plus, I couldn't put ALL of the reviews in here, it'd be way too tedious. So yeah, just know that whether you're in here or not, you kick ass :P**

**Well, I must ride off into the night on my unicorn named Brittany, who is actually a male but he likes the name Brittany so it's cool :D HUZZAH!**


End file.
